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Ho-ho-hold on Santa!

Prepping Santa for a job interview.

Santa does a fantastic job and he seems to love it, but what if he called me to say he wants to try something new?

I’d have to start by considering what type of work his ‘transferable skills’ might suit. A few possibilities spring to mind:

 

  • Project manager?
  • He’s been delivering on time and to plan for over 1,500 years.
  • Logistics specialist?
  • No one, but no one, can offer guaranteed overnight delivery like Santa, even if it takes him all year to prepare for it.
  • Personal shopper?
  • He’s (usually) great at choosing gifts that people really love.
  • Police or intelligence officer?
  • He’s knows who’s naughty, he knows who’s nice, he sees you when you’re sleeping, he knows when you’re awake ….
  • Chimney sweep or steeplejack?
  • He’s a dab hand at shinning up and down chimneys and doesn’t get stuck that often.
  • Polar explorer?
  • He comes equipped with his own sleigh and team of reindeer and he knows the North Pole like the back of his hand.

What about Santa’s professional and personal attributes? What would I advise him to highlight in his CV, and what should I encourage him to play down? On the positive side, he’s famous for his cheery nature and, with his huge team of loyal elves, he must be a really inspiring leader, with great delegation skills. It might be best though not to dwell on his habit of slipping down chimneys and sneaking into children’s rooms in the middle of the night, or on his fondness for a mince pie and a brandy while he’s at work.

So far, so good but, before I start pitching Santa to prospective employers, I’ll need to know his earnings expectations. According to US website Insure.com’s annual ‘Santa Index’, he’s set to trouser around £117,000 in 2016. If he wants to match that elsewhere, I’ll need to be on the lookout for a pretty senior position.

Tidy up that beard

Appearances matter and Santa has a unique look, all of his own. So, if I did manage to get him an interview, what sartorial advice would I give him? Well, it’s the same advice I’d give any of my candidates. Think about how to dress appropriately for the role – that red suit might go down well at Arsenal or Man United, but it might not be so well received at Chelsea.  And the beard – I know beards are hip right now, but you might want to think about giving it a bit of a trim.

Do I believe in him?

Of course I do, he’s Santa! I’d love to be his little helper, but I’m not sure I can this time around.

I can’t see anything that qualifies him to work in the pensions industry. In fact, the length of time he’s been doing what he does suggests he might not even know what a pension is.

My advice to Santa? Ho-ho-hold on to the job you do so well.

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